"Good." He still has dreams about being dragged by a rathtar sometimes, though not many. No, if Finn sleeps uneasily it's more likely to be a dream about a snowy forest and a red lightsaber, and he wakes with his back aching. The muscle is mostly healed, but he'll have the scar forever.
He tags along with Poe to the galley and firmly resolves to eat his share slowly. Eating dessert is not a competition. Damn, they look good, though. "I can get behind relaxing. What should I start with?" They all look tasty.
Poe regards the tray with the discerning eye of a man who has long cultivated his sweet tooth. "Depends what you like," he says after a moment. "If you like creamy, with a bit of tang to it, this is cheese cake." He continues on, pointing as he goes. "This one's sweet but also spicy... As in flavorful and also hot. This one's sweet chocolate, this one's more bitter but very rich. This one is spiced fruit, sweet fruit here, and a butter cake so you get your sweet and salty at the same time."
Nope, firmly keeping his brain from going anywhere sexual with this. Not thinking about cream or licking or any of that.
That all sounds good, and even though they ate a short while ago he can feel his mouth watering at Poe's descriptions matches to the art of the desserts. After some deliberation, he decides to start off with the butter cake. (And then he wants to try that sweet-and-spicy thing, and the spiced fruit, and the cheesecake and basically all of it.)
It's a good choice, judging by the slightly euphoric expression he gets after taking a bite. "This is really good," he mutters through a full mouth.
And this is why he ordered trays instead of individual desserts. He had a feeling Finn would associate trying everything. He watches his friend eat and feels very pleased with himself as he nibbled his own patty. "Thought you'd like it. Rations on base aren't bad, but they don't really believe in dessert."
At least not like it's an art. The kitchen makes fruit ice sometimes, on hot days. Hell have to make sure Finn gets to try that too.
Finn nods enthusiastically and swallows, pausing with a few bites left. "And you got two trays so we can each have one of everything?" That's Poe, thinking ahead (and clearly enjoying his own fancy-looking dessert. Finn's not even sure what it is.)
He gives a long look at the rest of the tray and unconsciously licks his lips. "That'll last the whole trip, if we pace ourselves." And...probably make themselves sick if they eat it all now. So yes. Pacing things. But he can at least polish off the rest of his cake now, and he does with gusto.
Poe grins. "You got it. Though if there's something you don't like, don't worry. I'll eat it for you." Considering the way Finn eats, he really doubts that's a risk.
And yeah. "Pacing yourself is the name of the game. Gotta make it all last till we get to Yavin, that's the challenge." He loops and arm around Finn's shoulders. "Think you can handle that?"
Did Poe see him eyeing that spicy-hot one? Finn's not sure if that will make a good dessert or not, but it's good to know it won't go to waste. "Can't let food go to waste," he agrees. Even the most questionable-looking of these desserts looks infinitely superior to roast tauntaun, though.
He grins and relaxes into Poe's companionable gesture. "Easy. But do they have desserts there, or are we out of luck until we get to--where was it you said we were going?"
Well, he means it more generally, but spicy and sweet definitely isn't everyone's speed.
"Spira. And yeah, at Yavin it's just going to be regular base rations. But Spira will make up for it. They do this thing with ice and fruit... well, lots of different things. Perfect sweet for sitting on a beach and watching the sunset."
"Spira," he muses, relaxing a little more into Poe's arm. "Never been there." Of course, the Reistance probably would have heard about it if a major tourist destination had seen Stormtroopers, but it's firmly enough inside the Republic's borders that the First Order wouldn't risk it without a truly phenomenal reward.
It's strange to know they'll be safe, really safe; what with the First Order knowing the Resistance Base's location, they're not exactly safe there, and he's heard the General discuss making a move several times. As long as it's somewhere Poe goes with him and Rey will be able to find later, he doesn't mind.
"I hope you'll like it." He's pretty sure Finn will. And this...it's nice. Dessert in one hand, Finn leaning against his arm, he's feeling more content than he has in months. Leave was definitely a good idea.
#
The flight to Yavin is uneventful, the delivery goes well, and Finn's like a puppy, looking all over at the site of the famous battle. There's even a few chunks of the original Death Star in a small museum. Gives Poe a chill looking at it.
Then they're back on the ship and heading for Spira, another several days of flight time. As he'd said, there are no new dessert trays, but he's sure they'll make up for it once they're on the beach. He spends a lot of his time in the galley area, kicked back on the bench and reading. It's not quite as comfortable as his bunk, but he'd rather hang out in a public area so he's around for Finn.
Finn's spent more of his time napping than he would have thought, but he is after all still recovering from his injury. Yavin was a real treat - on the one hand, just a base, but on the other hand the site of a battle that had changed the course of everything. It had got him so excited he'd finished up Palpatine that night, and so as a cool-down he's now reading some more of his Resistance manual.
He's past all the major regulations now, having occasionally stopped and asked for points of clarification from Poe. There's one that really gets him, though, the one he's reading today. He has to read over it a couple times, looking more and more perplexed each time. Finally, he looks up.
"Fraternization between troops may only be pursued when off-duty. Is that right?" His tone isn't pure confusion - he understands what it's saying - but it's got a healthy amount of disbelief in there.
Poe looks up from his own book, where cheery Miss Mapperlee had just asked her droid Saflower to analyze the shoe prints left under a window by the dastardly thief. "...what?"
It takes a moment for his brain to even catch up why this is confusing. Actually, no, he's still not sure what the point of confusion is. "...well, you sure don't want people fraternizing on duty, right?"
"No, no, but--it's allowed? At all? Not just when you get invalidated out and have to retire?"
The First Order is not exactly permissive of such things. They happened - there's no stopping that - but they put a damper on it as much as humanly possible.
"Not like you're going to be able to stop people, right?" Poe says. "Stressful situations, people need emotional support. And physical support. And yeah. To feel okay and normal, if nothing else. And then there's the long stretches of boredom..." He shrugs. "You're just supposed to keep it out of your unit since that can get messy on deployment."
Finn shakes his head. Emotional support? Feeling normal? It was certainly no solution to boredom he'd ever heard the First Order propose.
"People can be stopped," he says slowly. "And if you do well enough in exercises after, they take you off the drugs 'cause they're too expensive to dose everyone all the time. Too many strikes and you get a more permanent solution." No one he'd ever known personally, but word had it three of the FCs had been caught out and punished not long ago.
He stares at Finn for a moment, trying to make sense of that. No, he doesn't want to make sense of that. Then he tosses his reader down, gets up, and walks a lap around the galley space. That urge to punch something is back in force.
Yeah, well, what did he expect out of an organization that runs on torture? That's commanded by an evil murderer whose fingers he can still feel dragging through his brain? Stupid, Poe, really stupid.
And even more stupid, because him having a fit of temper isn't going to make Finn feel any better. He stops. He makes himself take a deep breath. And he says, trying to find his cheerier equilibrium again, "Yeah, well you're not there any more."
Finn is taken aback by Poe's hostility for a moment, but only long enough to realize the anger isn't directed at him. No, Poe's mad for him, and that's unexpected in an entirely different way. It makes him feel...well, he didn't think he could feel better about his friend, because he already likes Poe a lot, but--it solidifies the feeling, maybe.
"No. No, I'm not." He taps the text display thoughtfully. "So that's why you had those toys in your room."
Well, that's another left turn for this conversation to take. Poe stares in disbelief for a moment; he has a much easier time doing sudden directional changes in combat, thanks. Because this leads to a lot of questions:
1) How does Finn even know about this? 2) Does Finn mean in the general sense? 3) Or does he mean specifically for Finn? 4) And that option is incredibly messed up. Not even a question, just a thought.
With all that colliding in his brain, the best he can manage is: "...what?"
Of course BB-8 did that. Of course. Poe is struck by the sudden and impossible urge to strangle something that doesn't actually have a neck. He knows it's a temporary surge of irritation, but this is all too much. He's generally not a guy embarrassed by his sexuality or expression thereof, but it's still one hell of a line getting crossed when it ends up with someone rooting through his sex toys at the behest of his droid. That it's someone he has a crush on and doesn't know how to approach is just the cherry on a crap sundae.
There's a long stare at Finn and BB-8. Then Poe says, "You guys feel free to argue about whose fault anything is. I'm going to go check our course."
Yes, this is him running away. Strategic retreat. Same thing.
(No you don't, we're still on autopilot for at least five more hours.) But, not wanting to press its luck, BB-8 rolls off. (I know, I know, someone has to empty the garbage compactor.)
Leaving poor Finn all alone to think about what exactly just happened.
He should have apologized to Poe for letting that slip. For seeing that in the first place. Well, he'll apologize when Poe comes back. It's a small ship.
That's enough manual reading for now, though, so he peeks at the mystery Poe was reading, and before long he's totally engrossed.
Poe resolutely ignores BB-8, because he is not going to get in a nitpicking fight with a droid. That's a sure way to lose. He doesn't need to check the course. But he wants to and is going to.
He stays up in the cockpit a lot longer than necessary while he tries to figure out just what to do. Nothing seems to be the winning option. Just pretend that there was no awkward conversation and he didn't just run off to hide in the cockpit. Fresh start. Move on. Two friends going on leave together, it should not be this complicated.
Okay, so that's settled. Everything is fine.
He heads back to the galley to find Finn reading his book. And apparently enjoying it. And since he's pretending the last twenty minutes didn't happen, he's just going to enjoy that for what it is. "If you like those, I've got the whole rest of the series."
"Yeah, I like it. Her droid is the one that does all the legwork, though." But he puts the reader down, because no matter what Poe said about sharing reading material it's still looking at this stuff, and that's part of the problem, isn't it?
"Look, Poe, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you angry. I wasn't thinking straight. I won't bring it up again, okay?"
"Yeah, that's kind of the ongoing joke of the series. They make a good team, though."
Maybe he should have told Finn that they were pretending that never happened. Oh well, at least it's just an apology and not something incalculably worse. "It's okay, I'm not mad." Mostly. Much. And more at BB-8 than Finn. He almost says, thanks, it's not really appropriate conversation, but stops himself. Because he has to remind himself that Finn is new at a lot of this. He doesn't know what's appropriate or not, and he needs to have someone it's safe to talk to. And come on, he'd taken the guy to a porn shop. The door had kind of already been opened.
Even if this particular topic is going to be tough on Poe since... yeah. That stupid Dameron heart. Okay.
He slides into the seat across from Finn, elbows leaned on the table, hands folded in front of him. "No, it's fine. I shouldn't have gotten my hair in a twist. I get a lot of stuff is really different here. And you shouldn't be afraid to ask me questions or feel bad if you do. I promise I'll be less of a jerk about it."
Being kind to someone who needs it is way more important than momentary awkwardness or a tiny crack at his pride.
Finn grins just a tiny bit, quickly squashed. Maybe Poe's not mad now, but he sure had been after Finn had explained the consequences of breaking Rule #523.
"It's really different," he admits. "But that's why I'm trying to learn." When Poe sits, Finn reaches out a hand to cover up one of his. "I'm not afraid of you, Poe. Not like that." And the grin comes back. "Now, if I was flying on the other side from you, different story. But you've been a good friend to me."
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He tags along with Poe to the galley and firmly resolves to eat his share slowly. Eating dessert is not a competition. Damn, they look good, though. "I can get behind relaxing. What should I start with?" They all look tasty.
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Nope, firmly keeping his brain from going anywhere sexual with this. Not thinking about cream or licking or any of that.
Hell.
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It's a good choice, judging by the slightly euphoric expression he gets after taking a bite. "This is really good," he mutters through a full mouth.
(Don't talk with your mouth full!) BB-8 chides.
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At least not like it's an art. The kitchen makes fruit ice sometimes, on hot days. Hell have to make sure Finn gets to try that too.
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He gives a long look at the rest of the tray and unconsciously licks his lips. "That'll last the whole trip, if we pace ourselves." And...probably make themselves sick if they eat it all now. So yes. Pacing things. But he can at least polish off the rest of his cake now, and he does with gusto.
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And yeah. "Pacing yourself is the name of the game. Gotta make it all last till we get to Yavin, that's the challenge." He loops and arm around Finn's shoulders. "Think you can handle that?"
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He grins and relaxes into Poe's companionable gesture. "Easy. But do they have desserts there, or are we out of luck until we get to--where was it you said we were going?"
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"Spira. And yeah, at Yavin it's just going to be regular base rations. But Spira will make up for it. They do this thing with ice and fruit... well, lots of different things. Perfect sweet for sitting on a beach and watching the sunset."
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It's strange to know they'll be safe, really safe; what with the First Order knowing the Resistance Base's location, they're not exactly safe there, and he's heard the General discuss making a move several times. As long as it's somewhere Poe goes with him and Rey will be able to find later, he doesn't mind.
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#
The flight to Yavin is uneventful, the delivery goes well, and Finn's like a puppy, looking all over at the site of the famous battle. There's even a few chunks of the original Death Star in a small museum. Gives Poe a chill looking at it.
Then they're back on the ship and heading for Spira, another several days of flight time. As he'd said, there are no new dessert trays, but he's sure they'll make up for it once they're on the beach. He spends a lot of his time in the galley area, kicked back on the bench and reading. It's not quite as comfortable as his bunk, but he'd rather hang out in a public area so he's around for Finn.
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He's past all the major regulations now, having occasionally stopped and asked for points of clarification from Poe. There's one that really gets him, though, the one he's reading today. He has to read over it a couple times, looking more and more perplexed each time. Finally, he looks up.
"Fraternization between troops may only be pursued when off-duty. Is that right?" His tone isn't pure confusion - he understands what it's saying - but it's got a healthy amount of disbelief in there.
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It takes a moment for his brain to even catch up why this is confusing. Actually, no, he's still not sure what the point of confusion is. "...well, you sure don't want people fraternizing on duty, right?"
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The First Order is not exactly permissive of such things. They happened - there's no stopping that - but they put a damper on it as much as humanly possible.
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"People can be stopped," he says slowly. "And if you do well enough in exercises after, they take you off the drugs 'cause they're too expensive to dose everyone all the time. Too many strikes and you get a more permanent solution." No one he'd ever known personally, but word had it three of the FCs had been caught out and punished not long ago.
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Yeah, well, what did he expect out of an organization that runs on torture? That's commanded by an evil murderer whose fingers he can still feel dragging through his brain? Stupid, Poe, really stupid.
And even more stupid, because him having a fit of temper isn't going to make Finn feel any better. He stops. He makes himself take a deep breath. And he says, trying to find his cheerier equilibrium again, "Yeah, well you're not there any more."
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"No. No, I'm not." He taps the text display thoughtfully. "So that's why you had those toys in your room."
--He just said that out loud, didn't he. Oops.
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1) How does Finn even know about this?
2) Does Finn mean in the general sense?
3) Or does he mean specifically for Finn?
4) And that option is incredibly messed up. Not even a question, just a thought.
With all that colliding in his brain, the best he can manage is: "...what?"
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(Hey! You keep your pajamas in there most of the time! But this time they were in the clean laundry pile instead.) BB-8 chirps defensively.
"It is too your fault!" Finn hisses at the droid.
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There's a long stare at Finn and BB-8. Then Poe says, "You guys feel free to argue about whose fault anything is. I'm going to go check our course."
Yes, this is him running away. Strategic retreat. Same thing.
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Leaving poor Finn all alone to think about what exactly just happened.
He should have apologized to Poe for letting that slip. For seeing that in the first place. Well, he'll apologize when Poe comes back. It's a small ship.
That's enough manual reading for now, though, so he peeks at the mystery Poe was reading, and before long he's totally engrossed.
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He stays up in the cockpit a lot longer than necessary while he tries to figure out just what to do. Nothing seems to be the winning option. Just pretend that there was no awkward conversation and he didn't just run off to hide in the cockpit. Fresh start. Move on. Two friends going on leave together, it should not be this complicated.
Okay, so that's settled. Everything is fine.
He heads back to the galley to find Finn reading his book. And apparently enjoying it. And since he's pretending the last twenty minutes didn't happen, he's just going to enjoy that for what it is. "If you like those, I've got the whole rest of the series."
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"Look, Poe, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you angry. I wasn't thinking straight. I won't bring it up again, okay?"
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Maybe he should have told Finn that they were pretending that never happened. Oh well, at least it's just an apology and not something incalculably worse. "It's okay, I'm not mad." Mostly. Much. And more at BB-8 than Finn. He almost says, thanks, it's not really appropriate conversation, but stops himself. Because he has to remind himself that Finn is new at a lot of this. He doesn't know what's appropriate or not, and he needs to have someone it's safe to talk to. And come on, he'd taken the guy to a porn shop. The door had kind of already been opened.
Even if this particular topic is going to be tough on Poe since... yeah. That stupid Dameron heart. Okay.
He slides into the seat across from Finn, elbows leaned on the table, hands folded in front of him. "No, it's fine. I shouldn't have gotten my hair in a twist. I get a lot of stuff is really different here. And you shouldn't be afraid to ask me questions or feel bad if you do. I promise I'll be less of a jerk about it."
Being kind to someone who needs it is way more important than momentary awkwardness or a tiny crack at his pride.
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"It's really different," he admits. "But that's why I'm trying to learn." When Poe sits, Finn reaches out a hand to cover up one of his. "I'm not afraid of you, Poe. Not like that." And the grin comes back. "Now, if I was flying on the other side from you, different story. But you've been a good friend to me."
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