helluva_pilot | Drift Fleet Inbox

And you've got a new life now. And a whole lot of other virtues to have, and there ain't anything wrong with loyalty if it's aimed at people who aren't going to treat you like you're nothing but a tool.

[He grabs Finn's shoulder and gives it a firm shake.]

You have a lot of friends who haven't even heard of the First Order, let along had all that Bantha dung shoveled into their heads all their lives. So you keep calling yourself a traitor, but put yourself in my shoes for a minute. Or Pinkie's. Or the captain's. Hell, put yourself in General Kenobi's shoes, he already knows you were a stormtrooper. Do you think any one of us gives the tiniest piece of poodoo what Hux thinks? Do you really think we see you as anyone other than a guy who had the strength to turn against all the lies he'd been fed for his entire life and still manage to do what was morally right?

[The shake doesn't touch off his combat instincts; on some level, he knows he needs it. He also doesn't interrupt during Poe's speech, though he gets visibly more miserable by the end of it.

If it was that easy to accept, he wouldn't have always tried to redirect when Poe called him brave, or a hero.]

Poe, the only people I ever knew always accepted everything he said without question. What the hell am I supposed to think?

You're supposed to look around and see you aren't there any more. I know it can't be easy, buddy, but stuff has changed. And it's changed because you made a good choice. So you gotta find a way of seeing what's different in this new life, and take it in. I don't know how else to say it.

[Finn runs his hands through his hair, still visibly frustrated and upset. Intellectually, he knows Poe is right - this is a new life, and everything is different than it was at home. But emotionally, being caught unawares by the appearance of such a domineering, visible symbol of everything he'd hope to leave behind is impossible to just disregard.]

I can't just pretend things are going to be the same, though. Not with the First Order looking for me again.

The First Order ain't looking for you again, not here. Hux is. Maybe. By himself. He's got no one to order around. He's got no one doing his dirty work. He's got no friends. And I really doubt he's going to make many. [Because he is what is technically known as "a giant asshole."]

Edited 2016-06-14 00:57 (UTC)

[Or, as they say in Latin, Buttholius humongo.]

That's--that's just what I'm saying, though. He's a symbol, Poe. I can't just look at him and not see that.

You gotta try. Because he doesn't deserve to have that kind of control over you.

Every time you see him, maybe just take a step into my shoes, or Ahsoka's. Because we don't see a symbol. We see a bully, a murderer, and a gigantic sarlacc anus with red hair.

[Finn blinks. The mental image is almost enough to break him out of his mood.]

I don't think a sarlacc has an anus.

[And then he sighs.]

Okay. Okay, I'll try.

If a sarlacc did have an anus, it would look exactly like Hux, when his face is all... [Hand gesture indicating squished up.] You know. When he looks like he smells something bad and has to take a dump at the same time.

You know. How he always looks.

[He gives Finn's shoulder a reassuring squeeze.] That's all you can do. Try.

That's how he always--yeah. [Finn bites his lip and attempts a smile, even if it's weak.]

...I kinda freaked out there, didn't I?

That's better. [He gives Finn's shoulder a much gentler shake.]

You did, a little. But I don't blame you. It can't be easy.

[Finn takes a couple of deep breaths, trying to calm down further with the meditation he's been learning from the Jedi.]

Sorry, man. I guess I just never thought he'd show up.

You don't have to be sorry. I'm your friend. That's what I'm here for.

Guess it's a reminder that we never know who's going to pop their ugly head up. [Please not Kylo Ren next. Please not ever.]

Heh. I'd be a lot more freaked out if I didn't have anyone to go to.

[And considering how much he's already freaking out, that's saying something.

Finn bites his lip.]

Can I ask you for one more favor, Poe?

You've got a lot of friends here, Finn. Always remember that.

Sure, shoot.

When you transferred over, you said it might be okay if we bunked together, if I needed it.

Yeah. Offer still stands, Finn.

I think I do need it. At least for a couple days.

[Well, this is what comes from being totally platonic friends with someone you have a massive crush on. He's got this. Just a couple of dudes, being supportive of each other.]

Not a problem.

[He'll try not to have any nightmares, at least?]

Thanks, man. I--think I'd just feel better about it if I knew I wasn't alone, you know?

[It's not the nightmares he's worried about.]

It's not a problem. Any time you need me, I'm here.

[~~He could probably help with the accidental boner too~~.]

I'm gonna owe you even more after this.

[Hey guys gotta help each other out sometimes.]

You saved my life, Finn. And you're my friend. You don't owe me anything.

[Now that he's finally starting to relax a bit, Finn grins.]

Yeah, we'll see if you still think that in the morning.

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